Do you struggle with confidence?
Is it holding you back from living the life of your dreams?
Join the club, as this is an all too common problem for a lot of Dads.
I recently started a “Confidence Hacks” series on my You Tube channel.
Check out the first video here.
These are videos where I share 3 helpful tips to quickly boost your confidence.
Not only that, but I published two blog posts (see below) last month regarding confidence, and they’re some of the most read articles on this site.
Blog post #1: How To Boost Your Self-Confidence In 7 Days
Blog post #2: 8 Proven Tips To Boost Your Confidence
So like any smart content creator would do, I am going to continue publishing more of what the Total Dads nation (I appreciate both of you!) wants to read.
If you’re more of a video fan, here is this blog post in video form.
For those of you that are readers, just scroll past this video, and learn 3 tips on how to boost your self-confidence.
Why Confidence Tips?
I find that far too many Dads struggle with many things, that result in a lack of confidence.
This is something that I find every person on the face of the earth struggles with. Some might not admit it, but it’s just a fact of life.
Over the years, I have noticed that the ultra successful ones have a better time managing their self doubt. They still battle it, but they know how to control it.
A few years back, I asked New York Times Best Selling Author, Jon Acuff, how he handles it;
It’s an everyday struggle for him.
Know that you are not alone when it comes to self doubt.
This is another very common mindset battle people struggle with.
If this is a struggle of yours, once again, you are not alone.
Ryan Reynolds, Jennifer Lopez, Lady GaGa and Tom Hanks are some of several celebrities who struggle with it.
A lack of assertiveness can lead to a massive build up of stress.
No one needs more stress in their lives.
Fear of Judgement
Without a doubt, this is the biggest killer of dreams.
Indecisiveness is awfully close.
It seems like social media has only made this worse. There are just too many people out there that are worried sick of what others think of them.
This could be their spouse, parents, kids, family, friends, boss, next door neighbor or someone you went to high school with 20+ years ago.
That last one, I find to be quite common. I’ve spoke with many people over the years that have expressed that to me. I was fearful of judgement from some high school peers just a few short years ago.
I have not a damn clue. Such a waste.
Then I realized — they don’t give two shits of what I am doing with my life. They have a life of their own they are worried about — and what others think of them.
Most of these all stem from a lack of confidence.
Confidence is the medicine many, many need to overcome their stinkin’ thinkin’.
That is why I am publishing the YouTube series along with these blog posts.
It’s a massive problem holding Dads from living the life of their dreams, and a life they truly deserve.
I would like to be the catalyst for change.
3 “Unorthodox” Tips to Boost Confidence
I label these “unorthodox” as these aren’t the tips you typically read about.
These are all tips that have surprisingly worked for me, and hopefully will work for you as well.
These are all quick to implement, and designed to get you to take fast, imperfect action.
Get a Budgeting App
Yes, I find tracking my monthly income/expenses greatly increases by self confidence, and can do the same for you.
This is a startling statistic, 55% of Americans don’t have $500 cash for an emergency. The far majority of Americans are horrendous with managing money, and I would bet that most are not on a monthly budget.
Many complain about their income , and not making enough money (blame their boss, job, the economy, etc). It’s much easier to place blame, than it is to accept responsibility that maybe, they suck with managing money.
However, it doesn’t matter how much money you earn, if you don’t know how to manage it.
Don’t believe me?
Allen Iverson, my favorite NBA player, went bankrupt after earning $150 million.
John Daly, the golfer, went bankrupt after earning around $55 million.
Probably the most famous one, was Mike Tyson, who earned more than $400 million in his career, and filed for bankruptcy in 2003.
You have to be ruthless with your budget. Self discipline is key, and something far too many lack.
I started using Every Dollar last October, and it has been amazing. I am now planning my budget beforehand, and it’s making all the difference.
Imagine that…planing ahead actually works!
After a few months, it’s eye-opening to see what you spend your money on.
For example, over the last four months, I averaged $75.78 per month going out to eat. In prior months to that, pre-Every Dollar, it was close to $200 a month. I did not realize how much money I was wasting going out to eat, until I started tracking it.
Eating out, is a big reason why so many never have enough money at the end of the month. I get it, it’s convenient, I have two kids.
However, it adds up quickly.
Typically, it’s incredible unhealthy, too.
I have friend who I’ve told about how I spend around $70 a month going out to eat, and he doesn’t believe me. He said he typically spends that in a week.
Start a Healthy Habit
At the end of 2014, I read a book called The Slight Edge (get a copy here — you will NOT regret it).
I’ve read well over a hundred books, and that book is my all-time favorite. It holds the secret of success, if there was such thing.
This book taught me the importance of consistency, and daily disciplines.
Since reading that book, and The Miracle Morning, I have since tracked my habits/daily disciplines.
I am old school, and track them on a sheet of paper. I have tried apps and spreadsheets, and always go back to using pen & paper. You can download my exact Weekly Action Plan template here.
The four areas I focus on daily are; Mind, Health, Relationships and Wealth.
If you notice, those are the same four blog categories on this site.
These four areas are like buckets, and I make an effort to make daily deposits in each bucket.
I track these throughout the week, and feel a boost in confidence when I accomplish 85% of my weekly task/habits/disciplines.
However, when I have a shitty week, like last week, where I only accomplished 66.7% of my week habits, my confidence takes a hit. The Action Planner holds me accountable.
I add in new habits every once in awhile to challenge myself — push me outside my comfort zone.
I recently completed 13,000 push-ups. I did 100 push-ups a day for 130 consecutive days, never missing a single day. The only way I was able to do that, was I tracked it on my Weekly Action Plan.
The only reason I stopped was that I hurt my shoulder. As much as it pained me to stop, as I am quite stubborn, I really did not want to have should surgery.
That challenge, and sticking with it for so long, skyrocketed my confidence.
Last spring, I challenged myself to no alcohol for 30 days.
A challenge I had made to myself several times over the years, that always ended up in failure.
As I write this blog post, I am proud to say that I have not had a sip of alcohol in 289 days.
Absolutely mind-blowing to me, as it’s the longest I’ve went in 18 years.
My confidence has quintupled because of that.
The key to starting a healthy habit, is being consistent with it. The consistency is what will help you increase your self-confidence.
Like Ed Mylett says, “your self-confidence is the promises you make to yourself”
A simple way to boost your confidence is to KEEP THE PROMISES YOU MAKE TO YOURSELF!!!
It doesn’t matter.
Anytime I publish a blog post, a YouTube video, create a digital product/course, or send out an email…I feel an immense sense of pride, a sense of accomplishment and a sudden boost in confidence.
The more time I spent creating it, the bigger confidence spike I get.
The more vulnerable it is, the scarier it is to publish, my confidence soars.
You can create a YouTube channel and share your thoughts, opinions, experiences, wins, losses, lessons learned and/or hobbies. Basically, you can talk about whatever the Hell you want. It’s your channel! You can do the same with blogging.
You can create a blog (here is step-by-step process on how to launch a blog in 30 minutes). I find blogging to be incredibly therapeutic. Some of these blog posts take me 3-4 hours to write, edit & create graphics. When I hit ‘publish’ I am putting myself out into the World Wide Web. Sure, it can be scary at first, but like riding a bike, you quickly get used to it, and no longer fear crashing.
If a blog is overkill, start writing on a site like Medium.com. If you know how to operate Microsoft Word, you’ll be just fine as that make it insanely simple.
You can create a podcast, for free, with your phone. I recently did a video on exactly how to do this. Check it out here.
The internet gives us so many opportunities to share our gifts with the world.
Not only is sharing your gifts with the world helpful to others, it’s a damn good way to increase your self-confidence.
Wrapping It Up
A quick recap on these 3 “unorthodox” tips to quickly boost your confidence are;
- Start using a budgeting app
- Start a healthy habit
- Create something
All these are so simple to do, and you can get started today.
Speaking of healthy habits, I am going to share a couple new habits I recently started.
To share, maybe inspire you and to hold my ass accountable.
I am on day #7 of planking 3 minutes a day. Each week I plan to increase it by 30 seconds. Speedo season is right around the corner, and I have to look my best this summer ?
9 days ago, I watched a documentary on Netflix. Two days ago, I watched two more covering the same topic. These all revolved around plant based diets. The films were all extremely eye opening, and I thought to myself — that would be a damn good February challenge.
So, I decided to give up meat for the month of February.
A tall order, and not something I would have fathomed just two, short weeks ago. Instead of thinking about it, I just decided to go all in with it.
Just finishing up day 3, and it’s been relatively easy.
Will update the blog soon on this challenge, as I have a feeling I am going to be noticing some incredible health benefits from this challenge.
As always, if you have comments, questions or concerns, please post them below.
Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive a small affiliate commission at no extra cost to you.